The Pre, Pre, Pre Keynote Show

All you happy millions and millions of Pod-Zombies out there, groovin, movin and fusein to the music of your own private universe, mainlining to your brain all those heavenly sounds of McCartney, Simon, Dylan, Diamond, Franklin and Dianne.

This is the Pre, Pre, Pre Keynote Show, straight from the Bunker here in the high Mojave Desert in the pre, pre, pre dawn hours, exactly Two-Days-And-Six-Hours before the cataclysmic EVENT of the season, year, decade, century ~ the Apple Computer Keynote Address at Moscone Center in SFO.

As you all know, His Steveness will be speaking to the masses directly in that hour, hour-and-a-half, or two hour event. The Macworld Conference and Expo is thinly disguised as a corporate and commercial extravaganza of Mac-ness and related Mac and iPod products and software, of course. But we Mac-Heads and Pod-Zombies all know that it is our semi-yearly FIX: A major jolt to our already super-keyed senses and sensibilities.

For who else but Mac-people and Pod-people rock to this kind of thing? We, who do our mundane, day-to-day business with Chart, Pages, Work, Keynote, and Numbers – the nearly out-of-this-world, handed-down-from-aliens, light bright Business Software that makes doing business seem like (( fun )).

While the best of the rest of us digitize all the pixels for everyone’s eyes with those lofty, world-class, oh-so-easy-to-use Mac-based programs like iMovie, iDVD, iPhoto, as well as FreeHand, Illustrator, PhotoShop and LightWave (to name a handy few).

Others of you have erstwhile discovered the joys and the highs of creating the Sounds for our Pods, using those ultra-seminal applications like QuickTime, GarageBand and the ultimate Podcasting tool of all: iTunes. You play your white or black computer keyboards like a saxophone, or a clarinet, or a concert piano, or you find ways to hook real instruments into your USB and FireWire ports ~ all to deliver that electronic goodness to the rest of us Pod-Zombies.

The Mac World, the Mac Universe is groovin, movin and fusein to the music, the media, the podcasts, and the mastery of the previously unsuspected and well hidden Talent of all the near faceless masses of people who have learned to dream out loud on the Macintosh.

Yes, we need our FIX. Yes, it is just a few more days and hours before we have it.

And yes (sadly), the great majority of you are not going to be at the Macworld Keynote yourselves. Thus you depend on us humble, in-the-flesh MyMac Journalists to bring you the strings of sacred words as they are handed down from the stage at Moscone, minute-by-minute.

As for myself, in my semi-permanent residence in this Mojave bunker, you would think I would have no reliable means of delivering to you your FIX. Ah, but I have a Secret Weapon, which no other mortal has access to, which will enable me to bring to you as it happens, the blow-by-blows of Jobs-On-The-Stage, in-the-groove, and at the exact Center of The Reality Distortion Field.

What is my secret (you ask)?

An excellent friend and co-conspirator extraordinaire ~ a fan of mine, with well placed Ways and Means, who has faithfully in times past delivered to me the very jewels from the Keynote, as they were being handed out to the exclusive well-heeled-and-privleged Hoi-Poloi in the hallowed chambers of Moscone.

Her code name is Shalamar, but she is really the Mata-Hari of Macdom, in my estimation. Even I do not know the exact means by which she surreptitiously transmits to me the ever moving lines of text from that well electronified and secure Fortress of wireless denial, which the Keynote is designed to be, for the Rest Of Us.

The Rest Of Us are supposed to WAIT. Wait until the Keynote is over and the ‘professional’ Journalists deliver the goods. Or WAIT until the Keynote is over to watch the Quicktime Replay when it is posted at the sacred Apple QuickTime webpage.

I do not want to WAIT. Do you?

Stay tuned to this same Page and Website, and you will be well rewarded with the News-as-it-happens, Virtual, and Live, and transcribed with accompanying photos, from Moscone itself.

Then, stay on staying tuned to MyMac.com, while those on-the-spot favored few MyMac Journalists repleat these pages with on-the-scene photos, specifications, and world-class commentary direct from the floor of the Macworld Conference and Expo. You won’t miss a thing, if you stick with us.

PS, Here are a few pre, pre, pre photos, gleaned (stolen) from the World Wide Web, for your anticipative viewing pleasure.

Regards,
Roger Born
“What? Me Worry?”

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