Nemo’s Notes from Underground v2006.5

Nemo’s Notes from Underground, v2006.5

[Observed inside and outside my local Apple retail store this afternoon]

iPOD HI-FI

“Steve Jobs must be out of his mind. Do you know how MUCH Apple is charging for this one-piece speaker? No WAY am I or any normal person going to buy it for $350. I’ve been listening to it while I was waiting for my fiance, and watching the expressions on people’s faces. Every single one is curious, then plays around with that iPod hooked up to it, tries the remote control a little and gives up, then literally takes a giant step backwards when they check out the price tag. Okay, the sound is fine, maybe for $150 to $200, but — hey I bet you the cost comes waaaaaaay down within a year, to $250 tops, maybe lower. Apple makes a ton of profit on all their accessories and the Hi-Fi speaker is no exception. If Big Steve wants to have me test drive one in MY living room, ha! That’s about the only way he’ll ever see me using it any time soon.”

MACBOOK PRO

“Hey, check this out. Apple ships their new MacBook Pro with 512 RAM, but here in the store they secretly load up each demo machine with a Gig of memory. Shouldn’t they have some sort of disclosure statement so people know how they’re being tricked? And isn’t new iPhoto ’06 universal, or whatever it’s called? I launched it on this new pro laptop, and it opens just as slowly as on my computer at home. What’s going on? I think Apple wants everybody to buy the upgraded MacBook, with extra memory and faster hard drive, don’t you agree? And the speakers sound just as tinny as on my PowerBook. Big disappointment. Where do you think they’re headed next year and the year after, with both pro and amateur lines of laptops? Probably figure people will buy whatever they put out to sell, so simply maximize profits, right? I still think leaving out modems is a mistake, but I’ll need to test the built in camera to see how it compares to my original iSight. I’ll wait until gen 3 probably to buy any MacBook Pro, or even the amateur version.”

MAC MINI

“Expensive! Overpriced! Underpowered, with that cheapo memory bait and switch gimmick. I highly doubt if switchers will flock to these minis in droves. Notice how Apple hides the mini right here in the corner, and has MacBook Pros and Intel iMacs all over the place? What does that tell you? Anyway, if the new Intel mini had real memory for video and was around $450, they’d sell three times as many. People are pretty stupid, but this is the wrong way to promote such a potentially flexible compact CPU. Big mistake, Apple.”

GENIUS BAR

“Did you make an appointment at home? Why not? You can, you know, using the online service that comes with your ProCare card? Oh, you MUST renew it, and that way you get advance booking on all troubleshooting and tutorial appointments. Best hundred bucks I’ve spent all year, though I hope in a way more people don’t hear about it, because then it will be REALLY hard to lock in precise appointments in advance. But you should still renew yours today. I’m serious.”

STAFF SHIRTS

“Those are the ugliest grey employee shirts Apple ever gave to their in store staff. The company has a reputation for style, but this sucks bad. I’d be embarrassed to wear that piece of c**p at work, especially considering how little Apple retail employees are paid, so I hear. I can imagine what my Mom would say if I told her I had to wear that ugly shirt every day for a month.”