I know everyone’s been waiting and wondering: just where has Chris been? Why no posts of late? Wait, wait… That’s not even remotely true. People have been wondering about the new iMac, not what I’ve been doing. So onto iMac rumor… no wait, can’t do Apple stuff on the blog side, gotta save that for the features side. Which makes sense but it’s rough when you’re doing a stream of consciousness blog. I mean what if, for some reason, the iMac happens to intersect my stream of consciousness while I’m posting a blog?
No matter, it so happens that I’m watching what amounts to a freaking showmercial for Hero with Quentin Taratino and Jet Li on ESPN2. The premise is that they are supposed to be going over the greatest fight scenes ever in Martial Arts movies. But they’re really just trying to sell tickets. The pisser is that I missed the season ender of Monk. Tim, who caught it, lorded it over me, all “you suck, you Missed Monk, I hope you get halitosis” HA on you Tim Robertson, I already have a raging case of chronic halitosis. It’s why the wife keeps putting a garbage bag over my head while I’m sleeping…or so she says.
Where was I? Oh yeah. Great fight scenes in movies. I’m not going to restrict this to martial arts or call this list all-inclusive, these are just fight scenes I remember and really liked. So in no particular order the greatest fight scenes ever:
Cool Hand Luke: Great fight scene where Paul Newman battles (well is slaughtered by) George Kennedy.
The really great: He keeps getting up, getting punched and getting knocked down. Then he gets up. Repeat as necessary.
The too sedate: not as good as “Mah boy can eat fifty eggs”
Bloodsport: Frank Dux versus Paco
The Great: Just a really great fight. The two looked evenly matched, very believable.
The Late: Well aside from the fighting the movie sucked. In fact it sucks so much I watch every single time it’s on TV.
Bad Day At Blackrock: Spencer Tracy unleashes a can of whoop ass.
The Incredible: Spence whips a guy thoroughly and convincingly with one arm
The Inedible: The movie, while great, was light on action
They Live: Rowdy Roddy Piper -vs- Keith David
Consistently Amazing: They fight forever, it’s like eight minutes long and they’re fighting over trying on a pair of sunglasses. Great.
Unfortunately fazing: One name: Roddy Piper.
Christmas Vacation: Family -V- Squirrel
Reason it thrills: When the guy yells “Squirrel” you can actually feel the family’s fear of a sub 16 oz rodent.
Causation for ills: There was a plethora of stupid stuff throughout the movie.
That was great, a nice long entry after some time spent not posting. I’m sure everyone printed it out and searched for deeper meaning. Of course it is all fluff and pablum. I know people are hitting the spacebar looking for links and I won’t let the link seeking folks down. So without delay:
Links of Diversion (yeah it used be a whole overdone Bailey thing, but Bailey won’t even return my calls anymore.)
A great, and by great I mean a SPECTACULAR article on the new iMac. The guy is an artistic genius, plus he writes like Shakespeare, Capote, Hemmingway and Pynchon all rolled into one. Not to be missed, click on the pic for the text.
1500HP go kart The cool thing about this is that a regular guy built it. In my experience the coolest stuff is maybe two steps removed from using stuff laying around the house but most folks never try.
An interesting source of Election Prognostications
A small political note: It appears the GWB campaign is getting cozy with the SwiftBoat folks. You know the guys who are constantly denigrating John Kerry’s service and medals in Viet Nam. (A great article can be found here) I don’t have a dog in this fight but I think this is a pretty big mistake by the Republicans. I mean they can downplay JK’s service and all but at some point someone is going to ask GWB what he thinks of Vietnamese food. And he’ll have to say: Why don’t you ask someone who’s Dad couldn’t get them in the National Guard.
Tridiot Rating: Cancelled until daily posting resumes.
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